Flatliners (Requested)

The brat pack for spooky kids

So many of our late 80’s / early 90’s horror favorites are really just the decaying remains of the (more mainstream) brat pack crap. And I really say that with the utmost love and respect for 80’s horror.

In the past, I’ve gone on and on (like some idiot school girl myself) about how much I adore The Lost Boys. And while I can write objectively about it’s cheesy, audience-pleasing roots, it’s got more under the hood than just a creepifide version of that sappy, heart-string-tugging, feel-good nonsense that fueled the brat pack flicks.

There’s actually this weird, meta evolution within 80’s films that can literally follow kids from their adventuring, childhood Goonies days through one of the stereotypes laid out in your standard, brat packy, high school flick: were you the bad girl? You might just find yourself in The Lost Boys (or Heathers). Were you the good girl? Well fuck, you’re probably going to find yourself smack dab in the midst of Sixteen Candles or Say Anything or one of those cheerful high school flicks.

Putting ranty asides aside, I want to jump forward a bit here to the decline of the brat pack and the last great step in the meta evolution on those spooky kids: Flatliners.

Follow those “bad kids” out of Heathers and The Lost Boys and you’ll end up in med school with a group of kids who think killing themselves (to see “what’s on the other side”) and then reviving themselves to chat about it is somehow a good idea.

Far be it from me to judge anyone else’s choice of extracurricular activities but, how in the hell did anyone so technically smart come to this conclusion?! What a bunch of fucking morons. This fact lands Flatliners dead in the middle of another blog about "bad science" in movies; med school or not, these folks make some of the absolute dumbest decisions a scientist could ever make.

Add to that the fact that the “traumas” they relive / must forgive themselves for are painfully juvenile (I bullied some kid in high school. My daddy had a drug problem. Something about a kid falling out of tree…) What the hell is the message of this stupid movie? “The past is past. Get the fuck over it.” Or maybe, “All kids are fucking screwed up jerks, say you’re sorry and it’ll be okay."

Plot idiocies aside, this movie was clearly meant to draw a crowd: a little bit of a horror flick and a lot bit cast with “young, hip, up-and comers” of the time. Writing this blog as I am (without the benefit of the internet) I can’t look up how much money it made, but I’m pretty sure it fell (at least) into the “moderately successful” category.

And to be completely honest, I’m not really surprised by that fact. Flatliners is fairly charming when you look at it as the under appreciated love child of The Breakfast Club and The Lost Boys.

You can watch the Flatliners trailer here:

Rebuttal: 17 Disturbing Horror Movies You Will Never Watch Again

When I'm not watching movies, I'm reading about movies. I stumble across all kinds of articles, blog posts, book excerpts, etc. in my quest to absorb as much movie knowledge as possible. Now, I'm snotty and loud-mouthed and opinionated but I'd never begrudge another human their opinion. Seriously. You're absolutely welcome to have any opinion about any thing you want. However, I must warn you, if I think your opinion is stupid, I'm absolutely going to say so. I've recently stumbled on an article completely brimming with so many idiotic opinions that I'm actually compelled to craft a response. Here's the gist of the original article: there are some horror movies out there that are so disturbing , you'll only ever want to watch them once. I've have taken her original list and refuted her claims without pulling her entire article over. You can read the original article here . Let's start at the beginning, with her opening statement

Escape From Tomorrow

I love creative people who are willing to take risks with their art. I appreciate the refusal to do things by the rules. I'm also terribly impatient with mediocrity. Enter Escape From Tomorrow . Created by a team of rogue filmmakers, the movie was shot in the video mode of high-end still cameras. Actors shared scripts and shooting locations across their smartphones. Shot on location at Disney World, the parks were completely unaware this was all going on right under their mouse ears. I wanted to love Escape From Tomorrow. More than that, I wanted to be completely taken with its ingenuity and creativity and - oh yes - its originality. And there is really a simple brilliance to their covert plan; all families are roaming around the parks, taking videos and chatting on their phones. Just blend the fuck in, act like you belong, and you won't get caught. Too bad the movie can be summed up as: ambitious but Rubbish. As you can imagine (or possibly know), there was a ton of con

The Witch (2015)

You know the drill - there's ALWAYS spoilers. Don't want the movie ruined for you, come back after you've seen it. Also - I'm still without an editor - typos and bad grammar await you! I keep hoping that the cultural obsession with zombies will end; literally every other damn movie that comes 'round seems to feature some sort of shambling, undead being bent on devouring the weak flesh of regular humans. Once upon a time, zombies have have been used as a metaphor for the blind consumerism created by our capitalist society, or the perceived depletion of resources by immigrants, or even the ravages of time and disease on our frail bodies. Now it seems that the deeper social commentary has been lost as audiences mindlessly consume "zombie fiction" in an attempt to keep up with trends. ( How very meta - a film buddy of mine commented on this assessment! ) All of this is just a sideways rant, leading up to my actual point: it seems that zombie may actually

i'm kael's ghost

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