On Watching Crappy Movies - Sometimes, You Get A Surprise

I'm watching my pile of crap movies...

You know me.
You know that my gut reaction is to HATE anything that could possibly pass for a "chick flick".

...which is funny considering that my boy is the biggest, teenage girl you've ever seen... (laughs)

So anyway...

I've just finished "Uptown Girls" and "Mona Lisa Smile"... and while I wanted to despise them both - they were actually less vile than I anticipated. This IS NOT to say that either was 'good' - just that neither made me want to tear my eyes from their sockets.

On the other hand... I'm watching "Hatchet" - which is a little on the painful side.

As much as I love horror - I hate crap horror. I hate "film school" horror.

I remember watching the commentary on a H.G. Lewis movie - the interviewer asked him about making "bad movies" and Lewis replied, "I don't make bad movies. Everything is in focus. The dialog is synced to the film." (or something to that end).

And he's right; it can be said that he made "low budget movies." Or that he made "exploitation movies", but very, very technically, he did not make "bad movies".

But 'hatchet' - bad. period.
Maybe I'm too critical.
Maybe I'm too cynical.
Maybe I don't give people enough of a chance.
Maybe I'm not fair.

... yeah, and maybe I'm happy that way.

Comments

The Witch (2015)

You know the drill - there's ALWAYS spoilers. Don't want the movie ruined for you, come back after you've seen it. Also - I'm still without an editor - typos and bad grammar await you! I keep hoping that the cultural obsession with zombies will end; literally every other damn movie that comes 'round seems to feature some sort of shambling, undead being bent on devouring the weak flesh of regular humans. Once upon a time, zombies have have been used as a metaphor for the blind consumerism created by our capitalist society, or the perceived depletion of resources by immigrants, or even the ravages of time and disease on our frail bodies. Now it seems that the deeper social commentary has been lost as audiences mindlessly consume "zombie fiction" in an attempt to keep up with trends. ( How very meta - a film buddy of mine commented on this assessment! ) All of this is just a sideways rant, leading up to my actual point: it seems that zombie may actually...

Mother!

Alright friends and readers–this one is probably doubly filled with typos and grammar errors because I wrote it while angry. Good luck and happy reading. There are unpopular opinions in every realm. As a film student, you can truly strike a nerve when you say things like, "I fucking hate the self-indulgence of independent films and the way people idolize them." Or, you know, "Low lighting and slow pacing does not a good movie make." Or whatever. You can of course, objectively, understand how this happens. When you are creating art–when you are outside the system so to speak–you are free to explore things (subjects, techniques, etc.) that may need to be addressed and that freedom can become intoxicating and go to one's head. While it may seem only right or only fair to respect and accept each creative endeavor that every artist undertakes, it is unreasonable to believe that the world will remain forever patient with the self-obsession artists have. Th...

The Ones Below (2015)

Standard disclosure: there's ALWAYS spoilers. Don't want the movie ruined for you? Come back after you've seen it. And - I'm still without an editor - typos and bad grammar await you! Enjoy! When I was like 12 years old, my young (impressionable) friends and I watched The Hand That Rocks the Cradle ; Rebecca De Mornay is so gloriously evil in that movie that we ended up watching it all the damn time — much to the chagrin of my mother, I assume, who got real tired (real fast) of having to see this movie about a million damn times. What can I say? She was kind of a saint that way. Looking back, unsurprisingly, it's pretty easy to see that The Hand That Rocks the Cradle isn't really a terrific movie — although it's still pretty solid for a 90's thriller. Certainly it boasted some fairly well-known cast ( Ernie Hudson and Julianne Moore — whom my regular readers know that I absolutely hate, in particular.) but, the plot is actually pretty convolut...

i'm kael's ghost

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