For most, summer means sunshine, popsicles, and trips to the beach. For the rest of us, there are movies to be watched in the air conditioned comfort of our living rooms.
To help combat the heat, I've put together a quick list of "snowbound" horror flicks for you to enjoy. So grab some popcorn, crank the AC, kick back, and laugh in the face of the sun!
The Thing (1982)
$.25 version: scientists discover an alien life form frozen in Antarctica. All hell breaks loose.
Why it scares us: The Thing tackles a number of our fears - isolation, fear of the dark, the monster is within us, good old body horror, etc.
$.25 version: writer takes family to mountain-top resort for the winter. All hell breaks loose.
Why it scares us: The Shining is both a haunted house story and a portrait of one man's descent into madness.
$.25 version: a stranger wanders into a small town in Alaska where there is no sun for 30 days. All hell breaks loose.
Why it scares us: much like The Thing, 30 Days of Night plays on our fears of the dark and of complete and total isolation. It also turns our traditional, romantic notions of vampires on it's head.
Black Christmas (1974)
$.25 version: an obscene caller terrorizes some sorority girls. Then he kills them.
Why it scares us: we like to wrap things up, rationalize them, and apply reasons to why bad things happen. That way we can understand them. Black Christmas never allows us this satisfaction, the killer remains forever motiveless.
$.25 version: man brings home adorable pet for son. All hell breaks loose.
Why it scares us: not necessarily the scariest movie but it does play on our fears of foreigners and their "strange customs". It's also a thinly veiled lesson on following the rules and behaving appropriately.
$.25 version: shy little boy befriends strange little girl. Turns out, she's a very hungry little girl.
Why it scares us: we consider children sacred, when they turn out to be evil (demons, aliens, vampires, etc.) our world view is completely upended. Coupled with the notion that we have to kill them in order to survive ourselves, Let The Right One In paints the picture of a very bad day.
$.25 version: students vacationing in Norway stumble upon Nazi zombies. All hell breaks loose.
Why it scares us: dead is dead - when that no longer holds true, we're pushed to wonder what other universal truths no longer hold true. Does gravity still work?
$.25 version: serial killer turns into a snowman, continues killing. Not to be confused with the feel-good, Christmas comedy of the same name.
Why it scares us: it doesn't. But at least all your laughing is a great workout.
$.25 version: a couple of hunters accidentally piss off a Wendigo. Hilarity ensues.
Why it scares us: it doesn't. This Troma film is one of the worst movies on Earth - and I love it! It's definitely a bit of an homage to Evil Dead, keep that in mind if you're brave enough to watch it. Also. Keep your ears perked up for one of the most hilarious soundtracks you'll ever hear on any movie. My final word on that: chili.
Wrap up time.
I know I've missed some 60's/70's greats featuring Yeti or other abominable snow beasts but I figure this list is enough to keep you amused for an afternoon or so.
If you've got any favorites that I may have missed, feel free to add them in the comments! I love to hear what you cats think.
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